Being divorced, I can very much relate to this message and nothing in life has ever hurt so bad as that dream of spending eternity with your loved one going away. As I have stated in a comment on another devotion, forgiveness is one of the most important lessons I have taken from the Bible and as I get older, realize just how critical it is. As far as the divorce rate coming down, I am not too optimistic about that and in fact, feel it will increase for numerous reasons. One being that women are more career oriented than ever and alot are have discovered they do not need a spouse to support them financially. Secondly, affairs are more prominant than ever based on the ease of making contact with people through this very tool we are using here to comment and share ideas on these devotionals. The internet is having a major impact on the percentage of failed marriages. Not trying to be negative on this issue but it is the reality of it.

The 12 words in the devotion are like bricks in the foundation of marriage. There are opportunities to speak these words daily. Let's make the most of them. I am glad to know the Lord hates divorce but He loves the divorced. I once had a roommate in college who loved to play the Tammy Wynette (sp?) song D.I.V.O.R.C.E. (I know that dates me) and I hated that song. Just as there are positive words to speak it seems if married people would resolve to remove the "d" word from their vocabulary it would save many marriages. If divorce is not an option then something will be worked out.

As a newly divorced person who was married for 25 years, I feel for those who are going through it. Marriage is work and divorce is devasting. Give me the work any day. Of the 12 words, the only ones I ever heard were "I Love You" that's the easy one the rest aren't that easy. My ex will be unhappy with the life he chose eventually, but "I was wrong" and "I'm sorry" have never been part of his vocabulary and never will be. Sometimes the person God gave us just isn't capable of giving back what we give them.

A good friend gave me this quote/advice when I got married. It has saved me much grief. Practice it. It is 10,000% true. Jesus will be sweeter to you in humility.

I think this is VERY much the truth!!! My parents were married for 38 years (many of which were hard times) but, they seem to over come all problems that entered their lives. I was one of the very few (in school) that still lived with both parents. It's very important to work out your problems but I also feel that if the marriage is in certain condition, there may be a need for divorce. Sometimes divorce is needed in order to get out of a bad situation. Like myself, I was married for 9 years and it was a nightmare! I was mistreated, abused, and cheated on several times. Therefore that caused me to make a decision (that I very much hated to do)most of all, for my kids sake. I felt it was better to get my children out of the house with such a mad man in our home, rather than raise them to be disrespectful to others! Grant it, I had EVER intention in staying married. But it didnt work out. Now I'm waiting on God to lead my way!

You hear so many stories about couples that have been married for 30+ years and my parents just celebrated their 45th Anniversary. Going back to my original commment, through most of those years it was the tradition that the man worked and brought home the bread while the wife stayed home and did equally as important duties around the house. It isn't like that anymore and the trend is going to continue. They also didn't have the internet back than which is a huge contributing factor to infidelity.

The whole man work and woman stay home, or even visaversa, isn't really the glue that will hold you together. The best advice I have been given is to be a partner. Don't think that one person is responsible for one list and the other thier list. Then people act like they are going to hold each other accountable whatever. And if a husband did bring in the money and the wife did take care of the home, they might resent each other for either one. The wife may resent the husband because he doesn't do as much as she does arround the house and the husband resent the wife for not making enough money. I think the formula for a lasting marriage is exactly those 4 sayings, no matter what the situation. Divorce cannot be an option. Billy Graham's wife was asked if she ever thought of divorce in her marriage and she laughed and said something like thier is no way, she didn't have the word in her vocaulary. She laughed again and said that she did, however, consider killing him. Joking of course. Take the option away, make it like suicide. Life gets hard sometimes, sometimes it is excruciating. But just as you sometimes have to think of the good times in your life to get you through the bad, your marriage works the same way. You wouldn't kill yourself over it, at least most people don't. (The suicide rate is much lower than the divorce rate.) And also, "don't sweat the small stuff," and "get over it," are both very good ideas.

Boy I tell you what--it stinks to be living in these self-worshipping times. No wonder the divorce rate is through the roof. My parents divorced when I was young. Left a big impression on me about what modern marriage is all about (ME)--which is why I'll probably never get married. People are too caught up in themselves nowadays and commitment has lost all of it's meaning.

Florian, I think your comment hits the nail on the head regarding divorce and it's so unfortunate. You can never find happiness through selfishness. It's just not possible. Whether it's a spouse or someone else, let someone today know how much you care for them and that you are there for them.

Amen... it would be great if America could be #1 for its low divorce rate.

However, I dislike this statistic and the statistic about divorce in the church being as high as outside. A greater % of American Christians get married rather than live together for years out of wedlock as do the general European and US population. If the denominator was how many couples "set up housekeeping" together, the church folks ratio would look a little better.

Your point is still valid, but could be that much stronger if an apples to apples statistic could be quoted.

Love Steve, Master of "too fine a point"

Thank you, my family is going through one of the toughest times in our 15yrs together and your daily devotion have helped humble me in remembering its not our plans that were living. thank you for the reminders

I agree with the quote, but I think you are greatly misleading people in making it seem that simple. I have noticed this with many areas of your site.