I took care of my Mother with Alzheimers. She has past now,but I have the guilt of "Could I or Should I have done more" because due to other health problems,I had to put her in a Nursing home for care. I feel she never forgave me for doing that. I pray everyday for forgivness,if I made the wrong decision.

GALADY - I completely understand your feelings. My mother spent the last several months of her life in a nursing home. I know she didn't want to be there and it broke my heart every single day. But I want to encourage you, because I also know that, as it was in my case, you were doing what you knew was best for your mother. There was no possible way that I could give my mother the care she needed and neither could you. You have no need to ask for forgiveness and the decision you made was a difficult one, but it was the correct one. When your mother was in her right mind, she knew you loved her and I believe, even in a state of dementia, she carried that love in her heart. You treated your mother with the respect she deserved by giving her the best care you could provide. Now, hold your head high and don't let guilt get in the way of celebrating your mother's life, as well as taking care of your own. Guilt is an awful burden to carry and I hope you will lay it at the foot of the cross. My guess is that our mothers have already met and talked with each about their loving daughters in heaven! Bless you.

Thank you for the encouragement. My 89 year old mother in law has lived with us for 2 years and it is sometimes stressful and frustrating and I struggle with feeling as if we have lost OUR independence. My prayer each day is for God to continue to give me patience and kindness and to be a joyful caregiver!

This devotion is one that everyone needs to read. If our parents are alive we possible will have to go thru this before they leave this world. My Mother in law has been sick for some time now and my wife and her sister and two brothers are taking care of her, I pray the others will come around start helping before she passes. I have a stepfather who is also sick and just today we found out he has another tumor on his liver, we are staying at his side at the hospital and not the first one of his children has bothered to come visit him. Please pray that they will open their eyes and do right by him. Other than that everything is great in my world. God bless all of you

For Julie and all others in a similar situation...my Mom lived with us for 14 years and yes,as she aged ,meeting her needs and desires became more challenging.We also had our moments of feeling we had lost a degree of independance,but what we gained was worth a lot more. Our kids were raised with her and they have wonderful memories.No...they couldn't leave toys on the floor where she could fall on them,meals were a bit more bland because of her dietary restrictions, I had less free time because of frequent Dr.s appointments, our kids got up every day an hour earlier every day because she insisted on making them a healthy breakfast before they headed out for school...but they listened to her share stories of her childhood that they loved and asked to have repeated.She taught for 33 years so they received last minute help with homework.They snuggled in with her for Friday night movies until they all fell asleep together.My husband and I were able to go out for an evening at the last minute without having to scramble for a sitter, my mother stayed "young" because she was fully integrated into our family activities.We never had to face the reality of moving her into a nursing facility, but she and I agreed that if her physical needs became too much for care at home, we should do it for everyone's sake !Yes...we had less privacy,we moved a little slower,we made concessions,and we are glad we did it the way we did ! I can attest to the fact that when the end came, none of us had to deal with guilt or "what ifs".We miss her...we have wonderful memories...and I have never once felt that I could have done more. Our "Gram" was great and we were lucky to have had her with us as long as we did. You may not feel this positive while you're going through this phase of your life...but there will come a time when the care you are giving will bring comfort to you !

Several years ago I was in the challenging position of taking care of my mother who was wheelchair bound in her home while also homeschooling my young son. Sometimes they seemed liked siblings vying for my attention both wanting to be the "only child". I would at times have the bittersweet thought that my son was growing to independence while my mother was losing her independence. Before she died, my mother did go to live in a nice assisted living facility. We also used some home health care before she moved. I sometimes felt a bit embarrassed at the little requests my mother would make of the workers but one told me that she would rather know what pleased my mother than to hear about it later. That gave me so much relief and also gave me great respect for that home health care worker. There can be many blessings found in both taking care of a loved one at home and in having them to live in a facility. Just try to focus on the blessings and you will see more and more of them and always remember God is there with them. Parenting parents is definitely a time when prayer is a great support.