Hope After Divorce
"...we have fixed our hope on the living God, who is the Savior of all men, especially of believers." - 1 Timothy 4:10
Very often people who face divorce feel hopeless. Sadly, many who turn to the church for help feel rejected, not welcomed. Many have told me they felt outcast and shunned, even if they were the spouse left behind. Sometimes this is a perception, but sometimes it is very real. Tragically, the Christian army is the only army in the world known to shoot its wounded.
Yes, Scripture teaches that God hates divorce, but just because He hates divorce doesn't mean He hates the divorcee. He loves the divorcee. God hates divorce for many of the same reasons the divorcee hates divorce--most of all, for the pain and suffering it causes in so many lives. There is no doubt that divorce always results from sin, but it is not the unforgivable sin.
Divorce is never what God wants, but Jesus teaches us that we have a God of second chances--a God of forgiveness. When we trust in Christ and confess our sins to the Lord, we begin to realize He loves us and forgives us completely. We can find that total and complete healing in the person of Jesus Christ.
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15 Comments
God's timing is perfect and He is SO good. Today is a day full of much emotion for me. March 10th would be my eighteen year anniversary. I've been divorced for four years and struggle with the consequences of this EVERY single day (today being an especially difficult day). Divorce is a very deep wound for all who have endured it. It takes a long time to get your head and heart around the truth in this devotion and it is certainly a process. Thank you again for posting just the right thing on just the right day. There are no coincidences! This ministry is truly a blessing. - anonymous
Having been one of the ones left behind. Am I allowed to remarry.
It would not seem possible after reading Luke 16: 18. - Bill
I agree! There is wonderous hope after a divorce. But(there's that word again) anyone considering remarriage needs to study what Paul has written and also what Dr Luke wrote to us in Luke 16: 18: "Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced from her husband commits adultery"(NKJV). This seems very problematic. Christ has forgiven us of all our sins past, present, and future. But, are we guilty of pre-meditated adultery by planning and marrying a divorced individual even if there were Biblical grounds for the divorce???
- Bill
1 Corinthians 7:15 "But if the unbeliever leaves, let him (her)do so. A believing man or woman is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace."
Since Bill states his wife left him I would assume that means she filed for divorce so she divorced him. To me that indicates she is not a believer or she would have stayed in the marriage. The passage in Luke is in regards to the man who divorces his wife and not the one whose wife divorces him. So the way I read the verses and not really knowing all the details of the situation, on the surface it looks like Bill is free to remarry. There of course could be unrevealed details that would negate this amateur opinion. - Janice
This is just what I needed today. Isn't God wonderful?! He knows when you are hurting and sends such comfort. - Janice
I am so happy to hear that divorce is not the unforgiveable sin. I have felt for a long time that this is how the church views this sin. People who get divorced usually don't want it but see no other way to survive. It would be so nice if those facing divorce could find comfort and hope not only in the forgiveness of Christ but in the church as well. - annonymous
Nobody knows what a pain is going through a divorce, until you really experienced it by yourself - Yeslayne
Just wanted to respond to the scripture in Luke mentioned in the third comment. I believe we have to look at it with an open heart and let God speak to us. Not what we want but what God is telling us. We are committing adultery , that is what the scripture says. There is also the verse in Matthew that says "what GOd hath joined together, let not man put asunder" God has joined the married people, so man is not to seperate it, via divorce.I think this is very clear and I really do feel for those who have gone through a divorce and all that goes with it. I am in my 19th year now and can't imagine life without my husband. But at the same time, God will give you strentgh to endure. Just have faith and believe. Praying for you all. - concerned in the truth
No doubt divorce is one devastating event of every person's life. In divorce many suffer. This includes the sibling close to us and the ones who come after us. Remarriage of a Christian after divorce is perhaps the most controversial topic in Christian faith and there is no one size fit all answer to this question. In Christian faith we believe that a successful marriage is one which takes place between a couple that God has prepared them for each other. Yes there are many weddings but there may be a few marriages. I trust that God honors all marriages even though it may not have taken place in His will. Then how are we to define a Biblical divorce? Does God condone being alone without a spouse even though we all know overcoming temptations is a challenge. Would the moral of the society be healthy with abundance divorced individuals?I have no answer to these question but I know this that if there is a remarriage, both parties must be certain that their spouse is the one that the Lord has prepared for them. Obviously we are excluding infatuation, lust of the eye and all other reasons that may have caused the parties be attracted to one another, other than hearing God's voice in their hearts. If remarriage is God's will, then he will be responsible for this union. When God speaks to the hearts of a man and a woman in this regard, He has already seen them through pains of divorce and helped them see their part in it, helped recover fully and made them whole. - Roger
Divorce is a touchy subject and there are too many aspects to discuss in this type of forum. If a union divorces there is a need to determine if God joined the two in the first place. Thank goodness there is forgiveness for all but one sin and this is not it. No people should have multiple marriages just hopeing to find the right one but either way it is a sad time when families are torn apart. - Jerry
A noted theologian named JESUS said, "Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery against her.
12 And if she divorces her husband and marries another man, she commits adultery."
But maybe he was wrong. Right? - Erik
Many people's spiritual health has been damaged by ministry or congregation of a church treating them like lepers because they don't dress correctly(in their opinion), have been born into the wrong family or don't behave correctly.The holier than thou crowd have injured a lot of people! It took me years to understand that Christ is the answer, not the churchgoers! I know people who still refuse to return to church. - Michele
Too true Michelle. Church doesn't save a person, Christ is the only One who can do that.It is a sad reality and I know this isn't God's will. There are good "churches" out there , but remember you are accountable for yourself , no one else. Come judgement day it will be you and GOd. Like I keep saying, in other comments, pick up a Bible yourself and search for the truth yourself.God will give you the answers if you ask. - julie
All,
I agree with what Erik brings to light. If you're going to believe Christ, you need to do so. Don't pick and choose what suits your fancy. - David
David, all Christians are cherry-pickers. You have to be. The bible contradicts itself a million times over so you have no choice but to be a cherry-picker. They pick verse that's suitable to them, and abandon those that are not. They they sit back and call themselves "good". That kills me. - Jonathan